I have tried to write this “conclusion” installment of the Do Better series at least a dozen times. I want to tell you what I've learned in collecting, writing, and publishing the Do Better series. I want to share what I noticed from readers. I want to answer the common questions I've received. But to begin unpacking all of that is far too much for one article. And it definitely feels like it is too much for me to get my mind around right now. Turns out that there's no way to put a tidy little bow on such an enormous issue.

As I’ve been publishing the Do Better Series, I’ve been receiving many messages from women who are grateful that this series is shining light on their lived experiences in financial services, and sometimes they share one or two of their own experiences with me. I’m sharing this anonymized note, with permission of the woman who wrote it, so you can see how wide reaching and frequent this issue is.

As I began publishing the Do Better series, many people reached out to me- friends, colleagues, journalists, strangers. The response was so much more than I expected that I slowed down the pace of publication so I could better manage requests and correspondence as they came in.

The most common type of correspondence I received was women sharing their own terrible stories with me. I read every story and replied to as many as I could. Some of the women were willing for me to share their anonymized stories publicly. The stories below are told by the women-in-finance who experienced them and are shared with their permission, in the words of the women who wrote or spoke them to me. I edited some submissions for clarity, length, and to remove identifying details of all parties.

Leaving a firm or a role at an inopportune time can be damaging to a career trajectory. Our industry often wonders why so few women make it to the C-Suite; women opting out of abusive workplaces is an overlooked factor.

The following stories are from women who left their jobs, changed roles, and interrupted their careers- not because they wanted to, but because they felt they had to leave a bad situation.

Women who experience harassment, assault, and discrimination often don’t report the episodes for fear of retribution. Some women rightly fear retaliation that could ruin their career or bring mental or physical harm to themselves and their families. This fear of reporting silences victims and allows a culture of harassment and assault to continue. When women do report, their reports are often dismissed or brushed off. The stories are shared with their permission, in the words of the women who wrote or spoke them to me.

Harassment and discrimination are a regular part of work life for many women. Some of the incidents are obviously gross and awful. Others may seem small, innocuous or just a funny joke. “Microaggression” is a term often met with derision by people who haven’t been on the receiving end of such comments. But these subtle acts of discrimination or harassment against underrepresented groups can make individuals feel unwelcome, less likely to contribute to a conversation, ask for support they need, take risks, or continue to work at an organization. A thriving business needs all of their employees to feel comfortable doing all of those things. One incident, alone, may seem like no big deal, but a week, year, or lifetime full of comments, jokes, and objectification adds up; and it’s exhausting.

Below are stories of day-to-day harassment in the financial services workplace. The stories are told by the women-in-finance who experienced them.

Race, age, sexual orientation, citizenship status, and disability all factor into discrimination and harassment. Women in those and other marginalized or underrepresented groups face a compounding factor; racism and other types of bias can exacerbate the negative effects of sexual harassment and discrimination.

Below are stories of incidents in which women who self-identify as part of an underrepresented group experienced harassment because of their identity as part of that group.

Despite advances in hiring and pay practices, women working in financial services in the US are paid less on average than their male counterparts and are underrepresented at the senior leadership and board levels. The statistics are even bleaker for women of color. As the stories below illustrate, pervasive gender based discrimination still exists.

When women in financial services shared their experiences of harassment and assault with me, I immediately noticed how many of the incidents took place at industry events and conferences. Unchecked bad behavior runs rampant at many financial services conferences. Below are stories of harassment and assault incidents at conferences as told by the women-in-finance who experienced them.

When women in finance meet for the first time, stories of assault, harassment, and discrimination, often come out quickly, sharing notes on pay inequity, degrading experiences at conferences, and inappropriate touching from colleagues and bosses. We share these stories privately, and it’s a relief to be able to talk about it.

In the wake of the #MeToo movement, we’ve seen many articles about why there are so few women in financial services, as well as surveys and statistics about sexual harassment and discrimination. While statistics and surveys are helpful for measuring the issue, I want to share real stories of sexual harassment and gender discrimination.