I Woke Up Angry
I woke up so damn angry.
I’ve suspected this Supreme Court decision was coming since watching Justice Kavanaugh’s chilling confirmation hearings four years ago. Knowing this moment would come did not soften the blow. It is still awful. In fact, it’s worse than I anticipated.
To have 5 people
1 of whom is credibly accused of sexual harassment
1 of whom is credibly and repeatedly accused of sexual assault
3 of whom were appointed by a president credibly and repeatedly accused of sexual assault
4 of whom have never been pregnant or given birth
interpret a centuries-old document
the amendment of which did not even confer all women the right to vote until 1965*
based on the intent of its authors,
all of whom were white men
many of whom enslaved people
many of whom considered white women inferior to men, and considered Black women to be property
many of whom considered Native Americans a disposable obstacle in their quest to acquire land
and declare that pregnant people no longer have the right to bodily autonomy
or full reproductive healthcare
or privacy to speak about their health with medical professionals
or the ability to seek treatment for miscarriage without fear of legal repercussions
is enraging.
*Yes, I know the 19th amendment was ratified in 1920. But all women of color were not guaranteed the right to vote until the Voting Rights Act of 1965.
Abortion is healthcare.
Abortion is a medical procedure. Like many medical procedures, it may be elected for various legitimate (and often private) reasons including not wanting to be pregnant, not wanting to have (more) kids, not wanting to carry the product of rape, or because the pregnancy threatens the physical or mental health of the pregnant person.
You likely know someone -or several people - who have had an abortion. If you know me, you know at least one. Nobody owes anyone a public telling of their abortion story. But I want to share mine. I find that hearing first hand stories from people we know goes a long way in better understanding and contextualizing an issue that may feel foreign. So here’s my story:
Without quick and safe access to abortion I would have died in 2013.
My older son would have grown up without a mom.
My younger son would never have been conceived or born.
An enormous hole of grief would have formed in my family and community.
I would not have seen my kid(s) grow up.
I would not have watched my husband become a tenured professor.
I would not have seen my brother open a restaurant.
I would not have witnessed my parents enjoying their retirement.
I would not have found my love of gardening.
I would not have found my voice.
I would not have found my professional purpose.
Instead, I would have bled to death.
My life would have ended at 33 years old by hemorrhaging from an ectopic pregnancy.
Lest you think this is hyperbole, here is a partial record of medical visits for the seven weeks of my ectopic pregnancy, including 12 office appointments and two (agonizing) ER visits. Not included here are constant lab appointments for blood tests, and hospitalization for internal bleeding.
A family event, later in 2013. One I would not have been at, had I not survived.
Considering this theoretical possibility is awful. And right now, my theoretical story is likely someone’s real story, happening to a real person with a family, joys, passions, and a community of her own. The coming losses from this ruling will be staggering.
Pregnancy, birth, and parenthood should not be forced on anyone.
My story is one of the many cases where an abortion saved a woman’s life. But even if the pregnant person’s life is not at risk, or rather not explicitly at risk,
since the US maternal mortality rate is the worst of all industrialized countries,
and women often find their childbirth concerns and preferences are disregarded- this is especially so for Black women, who have more than double the (already high) average maternal mortality rate,
and even healthy pregnancies with easy births put immeasurable strain on all parts of a pregnant person’s body
parenting and raising children is hard. And doing so in a country that doesn’t materially support parents
since the US offers only limited or expensive (sometimes both) maternal and pediatric healthcare,
no guaranteed parental leave or income assistance,
very few social safety nets for families living in poverty,
limited and expensive childcare,
no protection against rampant gun violence (violence that was further enabled by these same justices),
can feel close to impossible.
Five justices have prioritized the potential future lives of embryos and fetuses over the current and future lives of the pregnant people who gestate those embryos.
A pregnant woman’s life has value.
A pregnant girl’s life has value.
A pregnant non-binary person’s life has value.
A pregnant transgender man’s life has value.
And here’s the real kicker. While the Supreme Court ruling allows states to make abortion illegal, criminalizing abortion doesn’t actually end abortion. It only ends safe and accessible abortions done in the care of trained medical professionals. Many people who do not want to carry a pregnancy to term will attempt abortion without proper medical supervision; and many of them will die.
“Pro-life” views that don’t extend to the lives of pregnant people and children are not pro-life at all. Lack of access to safe abortion kills pregnant people and shatters families and communities.
So, What Now?
If you are angry too, let your anger fuel you, so it does not burn you from within.
Support women and pregnant people.
Get loud. In your community, your family, and with your colleagues. I’m especially speaking to men here. Your voices are very much needed in this space. You likely have more power, more people listening to you, and less consequences than women do when we speak up.
Call your representatives and ask them what they are doing on this issue.
Donate to a local abortion fund. If there is one in your town, inquire how else you might be helpful.
No need to reinvent the wheel in your allyship. Find reproductive rights groups in your community and do what they are asking. They have been working in this space already and know what is needed right now.
Support women.
Support women not just because your rights are on the line next (though that is also true).
Support women not just because you have a mother, a sister, a wife, a daughter. Women need not be related to you to matter.
Support women because women - and all pregnant people - are full human beings whose lives, freedoms, and rights matter.